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Quick! Change! is an episode of Those Jupiter Janeens!, a part of the Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars universe.

Audio[]

Patreon exclusive.

Cast[]

WorkJuice Players[]

Guest Stars[]

Plot[]

The episode opens with the narrator catching the audience up with the history of Jib Janeen, and the abilities of Jupitarians. He explains that Jib has a family that he made the hard way, and is trying to get by the easy way. It just got easier thanks to his pals who are helping to raise his kids to be good shapeshifting spies. Jupiter people are purple, they talk weird and Jib's family has a catchphrase - "What a Rudy!"

Jib tells his kids that the pan-Jupiter war is over, but truces are made to be broken. He encourages them to shapeshift, but only Mariska complies.

Cool "Uncle" Johnny arrives home. Jib is angry with Johnny for not being home when he should be, as Jib has many things to do before his boss from the spy firm arrives for an important dinner. The entire family has to be perfect in order for her to give him the promotion. The kids have to pretend to be the parents, and the parents have to pretend to be the kids, as Jib had told that was the structure at home to his coworkers. But since this is a spy test for the family, they have to pretend to be someone they aren't, thus the kids acting as adults must act like the kids, and the adults acting like the kids must act like the adults. In the end, they decide to all just be themselves. However, Jib reveals that they must do this while red and white striped -- the hardest pattern and colors to shift into.

Jib attempts to rally the family, but the kids don't think they can do it, and Uncle Jeffy arrives home just then to say he's never changing shape again. Uncle Johnny called his shapeshifting asinine, and now he's upset. Jib would like Jeffy to make his boss think that he likes her in a romantic way to help it easier to get the promotion. Before they can reach a solution, Johnny has an announcement: He's not taking a break from shapeshifting.

Johnny explains that he'd been shapeshifting for Jenny Piccalo, but all of a sudden he just couldn't, so he's not shapeshifting for the time being. Jib tries to encourage him to try anyway, and asks the kids to show him how, but the kids insist that they're on strike.

The doorbell rings, and Jib again insists everyone shapeshift, but he's the only one who shifts. He tells Jeffy that Johnny yelled at him because he was upset about possibly losing his own virility, and Johnny that it happens to everyone when they're stressed, and maybe he took the wrong medicine. He also tells the kids that they can't go on strike, because they haven't properly unionized. Still, nobody shapeshifts while Jeffy opens the door.

Mrs. Plunkett enters, and says that no one in this family is up to code, and neither is the roast. As the family's shapeshifting is very poor, Jib is getting fired. Jib gives a heartwarming speech about his family. Jib also says he's going to get a lot of reading done while jobless. Uncle Jeffy then announces Jib's not getting fired, he's going to jail.

Jeffy reveals that he's actually not a Jupiter Spy, he's Bog Greatman of the USSA. He is arresting Jib for murder and espionage, and Mrs. Plunkett for grand espionage. His whole mission was to flush out Mrs. Plunkett, the queen bee of Jupiter's spy hive. Jib gives kudos to Jeffy for his spycraft, but sics Johnny on Jeffy. Johnny doesn't comply, and instead reveals that he's Master at Arms Johnny Hubbardly of the USSA.

Jib says he won't go to jail because he's innocent. Not of the spy parts, but because the Earth-Jupiter charter, protects the biological imperatives of the naitive species, and espionage is a biological imperative for Jupitarians.

The USSA officers point out that Jib is still responsible for the murders of Graymond and Antionette Fontaine, Instead, Mrs. Plunkett reveals she is actually Antionette Fontaine. She's a traitor to the USSA, but a hero to Jupiter. She tells the USSA officers that her husband is still alive, teaching espionage to children at spy camp.

Jib tells his kids this is a lesson -- the truth is valuable and keep it to yourself at all costs. Mrs. Plunkett, seeing what a good parent Jib is, grants him his job back, and the promotion, as being a good parent is criteria for spycraft. He also says he wouldn't be the parent he was without Johnny and Jeffy, who are also impressive spies. The kids object to Antionette and Jib saying they're going to have to kill the USSA men, and shapeshift to red and white stripes to show that they are serious.

Jib realizes he'd really miss Johnny and Jeffy, and offers to let them stay and help raise the kids, or else he'll have to kill them. They agree to stay and keep spying on each other, like a real family, until the kids are all grown up.

Marg asks if everyone is buddies again, and Jib agrees, they're all his buddies.

Notes[]

  • The kiddos were played by the three actors whose characters in Sparks Nevada, Marshal on Mars gestated to Jib Janeen's children. Presumably, Mariska, who Craig Cackowski played is the child Felton gave birth to, Marg, who Mark Gagliardi played, is the child Croach the Tracker gave birth to, and S. Epatha, who Busy Philipps played, is the child The Red Plains Rider gave birth to.
  • Several "commercial breaks" happen during the episode, though no commercials are heard.
  • The plight of the Fontaines was originally revealed in Into Darkness. It was previously thought that perhaps Antionette was serving as a coffee table after being frozen in carbonite.
  • Jenny Piccalo was a boy-crazy character in several late-season episodes of Happy Days.
  • The episode, while done in 1980's or early 1990's sitcom style, feels to largely be a parody of Full House.
  • The three Jupiter kiddos are named after actresses who were on the television program Law & Order: Marg Helgenberger, Mariska Hargitay, and S. Epatha Merkerson
  • Unofficial Transcript by actuallyaaronburr

Theme Song[]

Seems like things are always changing, that's what people say
Hey! And you never looked the same as you did yesterday!

But now that we're together you don't need a disguise
We'll tell lies as high as the skies and take the prize from the other guys!

And learn every secret that comes our way
Because we're Jupiter spies! Jupiter spies!
We're a family of Jupiter spies!
Sha na-na-na-na-na!

Continuity[]

Production[]

This episode was recorded at Largo on January 10, 2015 and released on March 9, 2015.

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